Feeling overwhelmed?

You have every right to be! And you have every right to express how you feel!

I recently saw a post on my social media feed that really bothered me. I'm sure the author of the post had good intentions, but I still received it as elitist and ableist.

"Whatever you attach ‘I am’ to… you become."  -Tony Robbins.

This is a beautiful quote that encourages readers to describe themselves and identify their identity using positive and empowering terms. So far, so good!

Except...

Examples of expressions used as those with negative connotations or to be avoided included: "I'm overwhelmed," "I'm stuck," "I'm not there yet." These expressions were used to define people's identities in a work context. It was explained that these expressions diminished the person using them. These expressions were compared to others such as "I am a leader," "I create my own environment, my own reality."

My initial reaction as a neurospicy woman was: "What an elitist and ableist thing to say!" I thought to myself, the person who posted this was lucky! Lucky not to be neurodivergent. Lucky to never to have struggled with mental health. Lucky to never to have felt overwhelmed. I didn't immediately understand why this post bothered me so much. I took a step back to think about it, and then, I understood.

I realized that what bothered me about this post wasn't the essence of the message the person was trying to convey. What bothered me was the fact that emotions were being equated with character traits and that these emotions were being used to describe a person's identity. That these emotions were being categorized as having a negative connotation while character traits were being perceived as positive, to describe a person's identity.

"I'm overwhelmed" should have been "I feel overwhelmed."

"I'm stuck" should have been "I feel stuck."

"I'm not there yet" should have been "I feel overwhelmed."

Your emotions do not define your identity.

Having emotions is not a negative thing.

Having emotions is healthy.

Expressing your emotions does not make you weak.

Expressing your emotions is a sign of emotional maturity.

Expressing your emotions is a way of asking for help.

Expressing your emotions simply means that you are a human being!

All of this to say...

Feeling overwhelmed? You have every right to be! And you have every right to express how you feel!

@Ariane Boucher, Psychosocial worker and human relations therapist